Therefore.....

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us.”

            --Hebrews 12:l

I took a class in college about the book of Hebrews taught by an amazing man of God named Brother Snell. We started out talking about how the prophets foretold of the coming High Priest that was above all priests. And we moved into discussing the differences between the Old Law and the New Law and how Jesus was the One to make it all happen. Then we came to chapter 11. Oh, good ol’ chapter 11. The Faith Chapter. You know the one, right? Where the writer goes through and recounts all of these amazing people of faith that have gone before. People who have been flogged and scourged. People who have built arks. People who have called down plagues on kingdoms. People who have packed up and left the only home they’ve ever known to go to a place they’ve never even heard of. People of faith.

And then comes Hebrews 12:1 and that wonderful word that you grow to love when you go to a bible college, “therefore…” Ahhh, therefore…what a great transitional word. It means that whatever comes after is in direct response to whatever has come before. “Therefore…since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses…” My amazing professor taught me that this verse meant that we are surrounded by all of these amazing people that the author of Hebrews describes. Those people are surrounding me. Cheering me on. Encouraging me in the faith. Helping me to throw off the things that hinder and to get rid of the sin that so easily entangles.

I have always absolutely loved that idea. What an amazing sight to imagine. Going through life in your “stadium” with all of the people of the faith in the stands, cheering you on. People like Enoch, Abraham, Isaac, Jacob, Joseph, Rehab, Dorcas, Lydia, Mary, Martha, and so many more. All of them cheering me on, clapping, whooping and hollering when I do what God is calling me to do or when I make the hard choice. People with whom I can relate. People who have gone through some of the same crazy things that I have. People who have handled it way better than I have. People who have handled it poorly, but whom I have learned so much from because of that. My great cloud of witnesses.

The older I get, the more I realize that it is not just the people of the bible who are my great cloud of witnesses. In fact, it isn’t even just people who have passed on to the greater realms of Heaven that are in my cloud of witnesses. Some of the people that fill the greatest section of the stands are people who are still very much alive. People like my amazing and godly parents who support me and tell me how proud they are of me and what I have chosen to do as a career. People like my aunts or uncles who are concerned about my well-being. People like my grandparents who send me emails when I accomplish something. People like my Sunday School teachers from when I was just a small child hiding behind my mom’s legs who still find time to pull me aside and ask me how I am “really doing.” People like the men and women whom I have really just met in the church I am ministering with who take the time to stop and give me a hug and tell me how glad they are that I have come to minister to their children or grandchildren. People like my friend from college that still asks me the “hard questions” even though we hardly ever find time to talk to one another. People like my best friend who never seems to tire of showing me grace and reminding me that God does indeed have a plan for me, even when I am having a hard time seeing it. I couldn’t even begin to count how many times these people have helped me with the sin that so easily entangles. A stern word here; a grace-filled word there.

Why is this important? Why take the time to blog about this topic? Well, because as I learn and grow, I am beginning to understand just how important it is to surround myself with these people. We must not neglect the power of the “extended family,” as Mark DeVries calls them in his book Family-Based Youth Ministry. It really, truly does take a village to raise a child. And what better village then the Family of God!

So who is in your great cloud of witnesses? Who is cheering you on toward love and good deeds? Who is helping you take off the sin that so easily entangles and everything that hinders? And if you are a parent, who is in the cloud for your children? Who is helping you raise your child and train him/her up in the way they should go?

Everything I Wish I Could Be...

Did you ever know that you're my hero?

You're everything I wish I could be

I can fly higher than an eagle

Cause you are the wind beneath my wings

Do you remember that song? With the orchestra "rockin' out" behind the classical voice of....wow....I'm not even sure who the classical singing voice was. But I remember it was loud....and it had some vibrato to it! :)

This song makes me chuckle. Yet at the same time...it can make me think. I will jokingly sing these lyrics to students or co-workers when they have done something that makes my day easier or when they have done something that I couldn't do. And the first line is always really easy and funny "Did you ever know that you're my hero?" But even in the joking around moments, I have a hard time singing the second line to most people: "You're everything I wish I could be..."

Tim has been doing a sermon series for the past two weeks on Jesus as our Hero. I had always considered the definition of "hero" to be something like: a man distinguished by exceptional courage, nobility, fortitude; a man who is idealized for possessing superior qualities in any field. But as I was listening to Tim's sermon yesterday on John the Baptist and then as I was running that song through my head this morning, I realized something. When it comes to the Christian faith, God expects us all to be Heroes.

We are supposed to become more like Him in ever increasing glory. We are supposed to follow after Him as hard as we can. We are supposed to take off the clothes of this world and be clothed in Christ. In other words, if we see Jesus as our Hero, and we are supposed to look more and more like Him every day that we live for Him, then that means that I also am intended to be a hero! I am supposed to be a woman of courage, nobility, and fortitude. I am supposed to have some superior qualities that I use for the good of the people.

If Jesus is my hero, then I need to look and think and act more and more like Him every day. And thankfully, I don't have to do that all on my own. Because as cheesy and cliche as it sounds, He is the wind that keeps me up in the air. He is the strength I need. He is my Rock. He is my Shelter. He is my Hero. I know that I will never be just like Jesus. But my prayer for me, and my prayer for you, is that as we worship our Hero and notice the things about Him that are heroic, that we would try to emulate those qualities.

And those thoughts make the words to the song I quoted all the more real. "Jesus, did You ever know that You're my hero? You're everything I wish I could be. I can fly higher than an eagle, because You are the wind beneath my wings."

"Falling." "Fall on!"

There are days in my life when I feel like I actually understand what God is doing........and then......I wake up.

Hebrews 11 says that "faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." Oh man...those words....grrrrr to those stinkin' words (fist waving in the air)! Anyone else in this world want to actually KNOW what is going on their lives and why it is happening instead of just trying to have "faith" that things are gonna work out? If there was ever a time in my life when this was true, it is now. I have listened to people all my life tell me that I just have to trust God and that all will be great. In fact, there is even a song that says that trusting will bring me happiness in Jesus. Trust. Ugh. What a word, right?"

Trust and obey for there's no other way to be happy in Jesus, than to trust and obey."

I love rules. Rules make the world go 'round. The people that drive me the most nuts are the people that think that rules don't apply to them and that they can do whatever they want regardless of what the rules say. I have always thought that I was really good at following rules. What frustrates me sometimes about my walk with Christ is that I don't know the plan. And I most definitely want to know the plan. I want to know what is happening now and why. I want to know what will happen tomorrow and why. I want to know what will happen in fifty years...and why. I want the plan because with the plan comes rules and with rules...comes happiness. Right? That's what the song says, right? Oh. Crud. No, it doesn't.

Trust.

Obey.

Sigh...

When I was in college, I was a part of a team that traveled around mainly to youth groups and did team building activities. At some point during most of our weekends, we would begin the "trust" initiatives. We had been trained to use certain commands to keep everyone in the know and to make sure that no one got hurt. The commands went as follows:

Faller: "(Catcher's name) are you ready?"

Catcher: "Yes (faller's name), I'm ready."

Faller: "Falling."

Catcher: "Fall on."

Most kids took this stuff seriously enough, but every once in awhile there were a few students that thought it would be funny to joke around during this portion of the initiative. This was always frustrating for me as a leader. The commands were meant to keep the kids safe while showing them the power of trust and the exhilarating reward that comes with obeying. If the kids goofed off, someone was bound to get hurt because they hadn't heard all of the rules that went along with the commands. That meant that things could get confusing. It meant that the student had to ask what was going on, and if the other students took it upon themselves to share the commands instead of asking us, then it was just a bunch of voices trying to relay things they had heard instead of simply listening to the voice that had said it originally. When the student chose to go to the original source (us), the confusion was cleared up.

It is the same with us. God's commands are intended to keep us safe while showing us the power of trust and the reward of obeying. When we only listen to the people around us who merely think they know what the Original Source said, we can get confused. But when those voices say what think followed up by pointing us to the Real Deal, the confusion is cleared up. Trusting and Obeying is not about blindly going through life. It is about following the commands that have been set up for us so that we can see the power of Trusting and the reward of Obeying.

What I am realizing more and more as I grow older...ish..., is that it is not just about the blind trust. It is not just about the falling and "hoping" that someone will be there to catch me. It's about obeying. God says over and over again that He is faithful. He says that He will make good on His promises. He says that all things will work out for the good. He may not tell me how every finite detail is going to pan out, or what the consequence will be for each choice I make. However, He has given me an entire book full of words that are meant to teach and to train me. Words that I am meant to obey. God has given me the commands to use so that I can know that it is safe to fall. He is letting me know that He is back there ready to catch me. He isn't messing around. He isn't joking. He knows that this is serious stuff. He wants me to trust Him, and He expects me to obey the commands.

"God are You ready?"

"Yes, Jess, I'm ready."

"Falling."

"Fall on."

Chazown: Part Two

The answer to the second question is tricky…as many things seem to be when it comes to figuring out what God has in store. However, this time, I believe I am actually approaching my decision from the right angle. See, all of my life, I have made decisions based on specific situations or short-term goals that I saw in my very near future. I would look at a situation, and I would say, “I could either do this, or I could do that.” It was always a decision based on the “thing” or option that was placed in front of me. Could I perform those tasks? Would that make me enough money to live on? Would I like doing most or all of the “things” that would be required of me?

For those of you who read my previous blog, you know that I had the privilege of taking a mini retreat where I was able to spend some much needed time with Jesus and do some soul searching with the help of a book titled Chazown. As I read, I was struck by the idea that there are many tasks, jobs, careers, etc that I could and would do, but that there is one overall vision of purpose for my life. In other words, it is not simply about the tasks, specific situations or short-term goals; it is about how those things fit into the bigger, broader, more long-term vision for my life. Now, understand, this is not my first time at the rodeo. I have heard this kind of thing said who knows how many times, but for some reason, it just really clicked with me during this particular retreat. What I have discovered, or more accurately, rediscovered, is that I have a huge passion for family & friends (aka relationships), worship (as a lifestyle not just music), and teens. Those were the three things that really stuck out to me. And those are the three things that shaped my decision as to where I need to be. Because of my connections to Iowa, I will be making the move at the end of January to live in the Cedar Falls area for a short time while I figure out how best to accomplish God’s long-term vision for my life.

I am not sure exactly what God has in store for me, but I believe that He has a plan and that that plan will be good. I know that I want to work with teens again. And I know that I want to be near my family again. I want to be influencing minds and lives, young and old alike, to live lives of worship that are holy and pleasing to God. Like I said, I am not sure exactly what this will look like, but I believe that it will include more writing of songs, more time with family & friends, and more time with teens.

So here I am again, packing, loading, squishing, shoving and finagling my belongings into a trailer (this time we planned for two trips!) to take on another adventure that I hope to never forget.

Chazown: Part One

One year ago, I packed, loaded, squished, shoved, and finagled, all of my belongings into the back of a trailer (ok, ok, ok, so it didn’t all fit the first go-round and my amazing father had to make TWO trips to Olathe for me…), and began an adventure I will never forget. I was given the amazing privilege of moving to Olathe, KS to participate in a church plant with two of the best friends I’ve ever had. And while I was incredibly sad to leave my family and a church I had come to love, I found myself blogging these words:

I know that God has something huge planned for me. I know that this move will prove to be one of the best and most amazing decisions and adventures that I have ever been on. I trust in the promise of God that says that all things will work out for the good for those who love the Lord. I believe with all my heart that God has great plans for 33 Church, and I, for one, cannot wait to see what happens with all of this.

As I look back over the past year, I am delighted to see that God has kept His promise and that my move to Olathe was definitely one of the best and most amazing decisions I have ever made. I have been in the process of learning what it means to trust God and follow after Him. Those lessons, as I’m sure most of you know, are not easy lessons to learn. You don’t just wake up one day and magically have the ability to blindly trust or the desire to follow someone (even God) through anything. I have spent the majority of my time in Olathe learning these two lessons. And I wouldn’t trade that for anything because I know that I am a better, stronger, more solid follower of Christ because of this past year.

A few months ago, I began to take a good, hard look at what I was doing and what I was going to be doing. I began to try to figure out what these lessons were all about. I was struggling—struggling to be happy, struggling to be joyful, struggling to worship, struggling to lead others in worship, struggling to reach out, and struggling to believe that I was in the right place. I was working three jobs—each of them demanding (and rightfully expecting) my full effort every time I walked through their doors. I was so overwhelmed with life that I didn’t know how to continue. So I decided to take a mini one-day retreat to the mountains of Grandview, MO to do some hiking and reading and talking with Jesus. That was the best decision I had made in a long time. The second best decision was to stop by the Christian bookstore and pick up the book Chazown by Craig Groeschel. I started off my hike with a desperate cry for help, “God, please, please, please, please….speak to me. I can’t hear you these days. Please speak to me!” Once again God answered my prayer and kept His promise to never leave me and kept His promise that if I sought Him, He would be found by me.

I won’t go into the very depths of the book or the conversation that I had with Jesus as I walked along those paths, but what I am writing to share with you today is this: My Jesus loves me, and He spoke me into being for a purpose, and it is my job to trust in that purpose and follow Him as He leads me in accomplishing that purpose. As I read that book and talked to Jesus, I came to the understanding that what I was doing here to help this amazing church that is being planted in Olathe was not really what I was created to do. I know that to some of you that might sound trite, or like a cop-out answer, but I promise you, I do not believe that it is either trite or a cop-out. My time here in Olathe has been hard, but up to that day, I had been determined to stick it out and try to make it work.

I decided that I needed to break this all down into two questions: Do I feel that I can accomplish God’s purpose for me to the fullest in my current context, aka this church plant? If so, then how do I make it work? And if not, then what do I need to be doing and where? (I know it looks like three questions, but it’s not; I promise!)

(For the sake of your time and blogging etiquette, I will address the first question in this blog and tackle the second question in my next blog.)

The answer to the first question was a sad and painful, no. This church that I have been privileged to be a part of for the past year is amazing. The vision is astounding and the passion behind it is awe-inspiring. I have never wanted to make something work and have never wanted to be a part of something like I have with this church. Not to mention the fact that the people who are leading this church are two of my very best friends. I have loved getting to know this church, which after only two months of meeting on a weekly basis has already become like a family. I know that if I were to stay, I would fall even more in love with the people of this church.

This church is going to do amazing things in the Olathe area. This church is going to do amazing things in the state of Kansas. This church is going to do amazing things in the world. I believe this church will change the world. I believe those things because I personally know the man whose passion and vision started it all. And that man will lead this church in an all out pursuit of Jesus and an all out blitz to share the story of that pursuit with anyone with whom they come in contact.

However, I feel that my gifts and passions and abilities are not beneficial to this church and to continue in my current position with this church will only lead to more frustration for me and for the vision of the church. I want this church to have every advantage it can in its pursuit of Jesus and the telling of that amazing pursuit, and I believe that there is someone out there who will be a huge asset to this church and to its vision. Someone who will wake up every morning with a passion to do all the things that need to be done to make this church everything it can be and should be. And while I wish that person was me, I have come to the realization that I do not have what is needed to make all of that happen.

As I bring this first blog to a close, I would ask my readers (surely there are at least two of you by now, right?) to join me as I pray for blessing on this church and as I pray for the next person that will join the church team in a leadership role. I know that God has big plans for this church plant, and I cannot wait to see all that He will do.

To be continued.....